Saturday, February 1, 2020

Proud Momma





Mason told me yesterday that a friend of his overheard two girls talking about him in class. They said how proud his parents must be that he got into Brown. I have heard that quite a bit when people hear where he is going. "You must be so proud." I said to Mason, "you know, that's not why I am proud of you, right?" His response? "Yes, I know you well enough to know that."

Do I love that he is going to Brown? Yep - mostly. As his mom, the distance isn't ideal but I will manage. After my visit there with him this summer it did seem like a really good fit. I think he will find kids there like him - smart, curious, driven. It is a good size, a great city and has the major he is looking for. Oh, and the golf. He was literally drooling when the coach was talking about some of the courses they will play. Shoot, I even recognized the names of the courses.

But getting into Brown is not why I am proud of this kid. I have known he was smart enough for any school for years. His brain has always worked a little differently. It has been a blessing and a curse for him. School has come easily, other things have not, especially when he was little. He overwhelmed easily. I think he was taking in so much that he would get overstimulated easily. Sleep and shutting off his brain has always been a battle. So his smarts....not news to me. I would love to take credit but let's be real. My grades were good but not a 4.0. My SAT score? Not even close. I could not have gotten in to an Ivy League. I'm good with it. We all have our strengths.

I am proud that he is pursuing a dream to play college golf. I am proud that he has put in thousands of hours on the golf course or with his coaches whether at 6 am before school or in the dark practicing after a tournament because he loves it and this is his dream. I am proud that he has pushed himself in school and never backed away from a challenging class. I am proud that he believes that moving across the country and pursuing a dream to play golf and pursue a degree is possible. This is outside his comfort zone but he knows he can do it. I am proud that he is wiling to take the risk.

I am also proud of the human he has become and is becoming. When he isn't at my house, we talk on the phone each night. If I try to get off the phone without talking about my day, he will stop me and make me tell him about it. He asks good questions. He is kind. When I told him I wasn't crazy about something he said about a kid, he made it right. He looks out for his sister. He is becoming a good listener. This has been a process but he is paying attention. 

If he had chosen to go somewhere else and could articulate his reasons and it still afforded him the opportunity to pursue his dream, I would be just as proud. Don't get me wrong, I will happily wear my new Brown sweatshirt.  I will applaud the exceptional education and experience that is ahead of him BUT I was proud of this human long before he got the acceptance letter.

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