Wednesday, November 5, 2014

Making Peace with the Voices


One of my favorite songs this past 6 months is Rhianna and Eminem’s The Monster. Odd considering that I have sensitive ears and both would often cause me to turn off the radio. This song makes me think and has a catchy and true chorus. I find I can’t help but sing right along with it - well, until Eminem starts yelling.
 
When all is right with my world, I AM friends with the monster under my bed and I do get along with the voices in my head. When I start fighting with them is when my world unravels. I know this comes as no surprise to those that know me, but I doubt myself all the time. I lose my cool when I shouldn't, I am nervous in big social situations and I tend to be anxious about what may come to pass. I often don’t feel good enough, smart enough etc. etc.
 
I am not alone. There is too big a stigma on mental health. Mental health is just as important as physical health but often we don’t address it because it is much less comfortable to talk about anxiety and depression than a cold and flu.
 
I have learned a secret these past few years working as a nurse that I want to share with you...More than half the people I see the hospital have mental health diagnosis in addition to their physical ailments. It’s true. Generalized anxiety and/or depression are the most common ones but I have also seen bipolar, anorexia, schizoaffective disorder...to name a few. That being said, I wish there was less of a stigma talking about it. It’s real.
 
Putting my patients aside, even just in my small circle growing up I had family and friends with eating disorders, anxiety, seasonal depression. I won’t lie...when I look at a patient’s history and see bipolar or something similar, I feel more wary entering the room. I am not quite sure what I am going to find. Honestly, more often than not, I find someone who doesn’t look that different than me. An individual with bipolar doesn’t necessarily mean they are either in a manic or depressive state and there is no in-between. Or, if they are on medications that are working effectively for them, they might not look any different than anyone else you come into contact with.
 
 
One lesson I am working on imparting to my kids that I hope sticks is that different doesn’t have to mean scary or bad. We all have our issues and for some the mental health issue is bigger and less manageable than others. Our brains don’t all work the same. Some will need interventions and possibly medications to manage their monsters and that’s okay. It’s okay to talk about the monsters.
 
I have a lot to learn in the area of mental health. I know my own experiences but for everyone who struggles in some area of mental health, it looks different. I will only know their story if we talk about it. I can’t assume to be an expert on anyone besides myself - and that’s questionable anyway. I was talking to a friend about ongoing sleep issues we have had at our house and how we address them. She thanked me for being so open. She said she would have thought she was the only one struggling with this if we hadn’t talked. Let’s keep talking so nobody feels that way.