Wednesday, July 28, 2021

My Ten Favorite Things in the Universe





Damn. Mental health is not to be taken lightly. I have always known this but it feels like it's hitting from all sides, publicly and privately right now. We are watching Olympic athletes pushed to the brink who are standing up and saying enough.. I need to breathe. I will not even pretend to know what that is like. I have people close to me telling me about physical manifestations of what is most likely anxiety in disguise. Others whose anxiety is potentially keeping them from reaching their potential in certain areas of their life. On top of that add covid, the delta variant and the wild ride this past year has been. I am very good about taking the mental health needs of those around me and my patients seriously but not always my own. I am on my fifth day in a row off of work and today I had to say out loud that I was devoting it to some self care activities because the past four have been filled with yard/house chores, tasks, lists... and not so much rest. My own mental health doesn't always take priority and I know I need to be more intentional about it.

So today, I started with a trail run at Tryon Creek. I can't remember the last time I went trail running and it brings me such peace. I got lost....not uncommon, but it was great. Then I followed it with a visit to my counselor who is remarkable. We have been together for several years and she laughed and was not all surprised to hear my break day included trail running. Then I had the chance to read and hang with Audrey and now here I am. I haven't written in awhile either. I had a whole myriad of life changes at one time and it turns out one needs a bit of time to unpack, process and remember how to share toothpaste and ice cream with another individual. So...I am going to work on this - my own health. I have scheduled all my medical appointments, reached out to friends and plan to get back to hiking, trail running and paddle boarding before the summer passes me by. 

The other night Mason told me that he and Natalie, who is now at Pepperdine and I miss greatly, made a list of each of their 10 favorite things in the universe and he challenged me to do the same. It has taken me a few days because the universe is big, but it's a good reminder to slow down and remember the things I am grateful for in the midst of all the chaos, discord and stress. So, here it is:

My Ten Favorite Things IN THE UNIVERSE in no particular order  

Mason's laugh
Audrey's hugs
Dan warming my side of the bed and then tucking me in at night
Hiking/running in Forest Park, Columbia Gorge or any of the beautiful PNW
My 5:30 am daily check ins with Jenny
Coffee
Standing in front of the Pacific Ocean
The feeling of Christmas morning BEFORE all the presents are opened
My library
Riding California Screaming (now the Incredicoaster) with Mason and feeling that stomach drop crazy free feeling even if it is momentary.

How lucky am I? The next couple of weeks I am going to work more diligently at reminding myself specifically what I am grateful for AND taking care of my physical and mental health. Audrey got in my space the other day when I was negative self talking and exclaimed "DON'T TALK TO MY GOOD FRIEND THAT WAY." It made me laugh out loud but she had a point. We talk to ourselves way worse than we would ever talk to a friend or loved one. I am a big believer in counseling and talking to someone who is not within your sphere so if you need any resources for counselors or just someone to listen...hit me up. The world is a big, weird, sometimes unkind place. No reason to go it alone.